Dear Jonathan and Alice
What shall I wear for the England v Italy match?
And what will you wear?
Me, probably an England white shirt with a straw hat.
Chili pork pies are in the fridge
And Tiger lager too
As well as several gallons of semi skimmed milk.
It’s been an exciting World Cup so far, with the home team Brazil lucky to beat a Croatian side that played them off the park.
If that wasn’t enough, Holland last night humbled the World Champions 5-1. Perhaps the beginning of the end of Spain’s era, not seen as graphically since 1588.
As for poor Australia, who played Chile. After 15 minutes they were losing 2-0. Perhaps it’s good night Vienna? Or Sydney. They’d be advised to Stick to Aussie rules football. There’s no competition to their national side in that sport.
So what will you do tonight?
I recommend seeing the match in Little Italy, but you must box clever.
If Italy win, announce that your Italian credentials are impeccable. “Mia madre est Italiana” and my feet come from her.
If England score bellow “Dio porco” to anyone within earshot.
But as a fallback learn to sing Nessun Dorma in English.