Neighbour problems everywhere

My son
Neighbour disputes are one of the most common  things things you can experience, and are invariably fuelled by a blend of selfishness and stupidity.

When earlier this afternoon Lynne told me she  heard a motor running outside, I went to investigate, only to find my next door neighbour  cleaning his rally motorbike with a power hose. He must have loved this bike, because he stuck at the job for the next 2 and a half hours.

The problem for us was that the cleaning exercise involved gallons of water and detergent, causing soap bubbles all around my garden shed, killing some early planted plants (there’s a water shortage here, but the NY I know is much better prepared).I don’t suppose you will get this kind of hassle in NYC, because that’s not what civilised people do, but this is Accrington.I tackled him about his activity and he explained that “…since rain water also drains into the garden, what’s the difference?”. You’d think he’d have  learned, even in Accrington, the difference between soapy and clean water’. Tomorrow I will look into his left ear, to see whether I can see daylight.I’m not optimistic. On Tuesday I’ll call environmental health, but I’m not optimistic there either – I’ve looked into their ears before.It’s a Bank Holiday here tomorrow, and Wednesday clinched automatic promotion yesterday at the expense of their neighbours, Sheffield United.
I guess you’re disappointed that Tottenham have lost out to the Arsenal in their search for a Champions league spot, but fear not.
Neighbour rivalry can be irksome, but in the case of Spurs, Arsenal, Wednesday and United it has its compensations.Athletic sport is healthy, and shower water isn’t drained into a next door neighbours’ garden.  

Published by Rob

Now 70, I'm getting back into website development and brand protection, as well as showcasing the delightful artistic talents of my beautiful wife Lynne. My projection will encompass a lifetime of database marketing, as well as the Christian democratic socialist ideals of my wife and I.

2 thoughts on “Neighbour problems everywhere

  1. As the current price of bike cleaner, or detergent, as you call it is around £15 per tub… I would hazard a guess that he wouldn't have had this connected to his petrol powered jetwash for 2.5hrs. It would have been cheaper to buy a new motorbike. Assuming a flow rate of 425 litres per hour from an average jet wash we can assume, admittedly disregarding any diversity factor, that a total of 1062.5 litres of fresh water would have been used during the excercise. Now assuming that one 5 litre tub of muc-off, detergent, was used during this activity we can calculate that the water to detergent percentile was only 0.00470558. Now I'm not a qualified biologist but I would guess this wouldn't make a jot of difference to your plant life. I would suggest that a fox taking a leak in some rainwater would cause more biological harm to your local garden of Eden. I'm all for expressing your views but to make it all so dramatic is just a bit silly. I do hope you find something else to occupy your time as this pent up aggression can't be good for your health. Kind regards.


  2. Thanks for the maths exercise.The mistake you make is in concluding that the concentration of the detergent is at all important.What's important to gardeners is the VOLUME of toxic detergent. It's irrelevant how much water it's diluted by.I appreciate that you're not a biologist but your guess that it makes no difference to the survival of plants is sadly wrong.Water is not the problem. Toxic detergent is. Or muc-off as you prefer to call it (I wonder why Proctor and Gamble invest millions in search of a dynamic brand name when clearly muc-off says it all)!The noise of the power jet is unmistakable, as is the noise of my neighbour's water pipes when the tap is open. And there was noise for 2 hr 30 min.According to your figures that's over a thousand litres used. Little wonder we have a water shortage in the UK.PS I like the way that you subtly use the third person singular to suggest that it's not you Andy, but a sympathetic brain who wrote this comment. Unfortunately you left your flies undone when you referred to my \”pent up aggression\” which a commenter from the other side of the globe wouldn't have been able to know about.Something else to occupy my time?My work is as a word-smith.And that means I sharpen my pen replying to responses like yours.


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